I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Randomize