As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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