You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
