just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
