Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I cant help but love a girl who informs me of the pregnancy test results by emailing me a YouTube clip of Barney Stinsons not a fathers day speech.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
Randomize
