yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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