dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
He sent me a picture of his ass and said the backdoor is open. Almost grabbed my keys and a condom before I saw it was a group text. Not nearly drunk enough for his desperation.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Randomize
