i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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