i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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