I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Randomize
