watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
