names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
Randomize
