I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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