I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
