Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
Randomize
