my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Are we still banned from the library?
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
