Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
