i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
