dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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