I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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