The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
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