It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Randomize