i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
He kissed a someone with a penis
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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