is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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