i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
you sent me 5 happy birthday texts last night. one after the other. spelled differently.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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