just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
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