Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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