in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
he's like watermelon oreos; I know they're gross and weird and I shouldn't like them, but I can't stop eating them because they're there.
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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