I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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