Michael Bay diarrhea
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
So last night I learned something new. Whenever I drink beer out of a bottle a random guy buys me another one. It was like as soon as the glass hit my lips every guy in a 20ft radius got a hard on.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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