He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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