There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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