i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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