The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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