so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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