Are we in a gay sports bar?
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
