So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
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