Can Purell be used as lube?
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
Randomize
