So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
