Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Randomize
