I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Randomize