I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Your cock deserves a montage
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
