he told me I talked like a deaf person
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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