Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
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