I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Randomize
