Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Randomize
