I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
How drunk do you think I'll be by the time I get home?
I just watched you drink a whole glass of wine through a Twizzler. Pretty drunk.
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
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