I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
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