She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
I’m photoshopping my boobs to up my Tinder game. I need better dick in 2020
Randomize
