Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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